HAPPY NEW YEAR 2017

Image result for happy new year bannersImage: courtesy google images.

Okay! It’s getting stale already I suppose, because the year is slowly but gradually ticking away. What are your plans, goals and aspiration for this year?  before you tell me It took me almost nine days to write a happy new year post, don’t forget that it is never too late to begin the year with dreams, goals and plans for a better year. At least I got my a…s up and I’m writing something. Don’t judge. Lol. But more seriously, I always look forward to the New Year because it makes us aware of our past mistakes and helps us refocus our energies into making better decisions and recreating healthier memories. As we begin to make plans, write goals, about the changes we expect to happen in our lives this year we need to carry a mindset of they are achievable.

However, why it is important and great to do all these at the beginning of a new year, this year 2017, we need to be Deliberate about our dreams, plans, goals, and strategies for the coming year. We need to be willing to work and walk the talk, we need to be ready to overcome the challenges, or else all our planning will become a mere wish before our eyes. I haven’t been deliberate about a lot of things in my life, but I have made my decisions to be more deliberate this year. You too should make that decision, yes! You. Lol.

This year, expect a lot of random post; after all this blog is about self-discovery. I will put a reminder on all my devices about all I need to get done, don’t forget to set deadlines for your goals this year, be realistic with them, be patient with yourself, most importantly, this year love , live and let live( what’s that? Well help me out. Lol) like the coaches on a Facebook community I belong to will say be #phenomenal #toolatetobenobody. CIAO

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What’s Your Take

I am an advocate of female independence but not to the extent of blatant disregard or disrespect to the male folk. I believe in women doing stuff for themselves and not waiting on the male folk to do stuff for them. I can guess you’ve probably heard women say that men should take care of women and this care, involves buying them expensive gifts, taking them to fancy dinners and practically paying for all their bills.

I’m not here to say that men shouldn’t pamper the women they love neither am I going to tell the female folk to get a life and start paying their bills instead of waiting for the men in their lives; all am going to do is paint a few scenarios and plead your indulgence to tell me your take on this issue.

We were talking sometime ago and we delved into relationship issues and what individuals go through in the name of being in a relationship. Someone among us made a statement thus; ” I cannot spend a dine on a man who expects me to pick up the bill after him, cook his meals, do his laundry and also expect me to do all the calling and ultimately sleep with me” she finally concluded by saying “once beaten, twice shy”

Scenario 1: James and Jane are  dating, they are seemingly in love and He treats her like a queen, calls her as often as he can, pays for dinner, picks her calls promptly, remembers her birthdays and surprises her with little gifts from time to time and never makes excuses on how busy or tight his schedules are and ensures that her needs are top priority. She doesn’t worry her pretty little head about how to pay her bills because she’s found  a reliable ATM(Automated Teller Machine) in James. she wonders why girls complain men don’t spend on women.

Scenario 2: Peter and Prisca have a different tale, Prisca makes excuses for Peter on the grounds that his busy schedule doesn’t permit him to call her, or take her to dinner or when he takes her to dinner he comes up with excuses on how his ATM card is temporarily out of service and he hates to carry cash or how he assumed the restaurant accepts debit cards;  hence, the reason he has to borrow some money from her to pay for dinner with the intent of paying but he never does, or his reason to cash in on mobile network free night call promo keeping her awake at night discussing irrelevant issues or his incessant habit of forgetting important dates and not being able to pick her calls during the day time because his choked up at work and barely has time for lunch.

scenario 3: Shank and Sheila have a different arrangement, they both share everything, they take turns to give each other a treat, not waiting on the other to do something. They love themselves and her both ready to come to a compromise, Sheila pays for dinner when Shank is broke, Shank tries as much as he can to meet sheila’s needs and she in turn meets him half way. They communicate freely without work schedules coming in between and understands when either one of them has to be away. they don’t forget important dates and ensure each one is memorable.

From all scenarios painted, what should be the role of both parties in a relationship, should it be the exclusive preserve of just a partner or should it be a partnership between two people who love themselves and are willing to make the sacrifice. Bear in mind the African perception that men should take care for their women, What’s your Take? ciao

St Valentine’s Day

courtesy: Google images

I love February 14th…Hmmm! it comes with lots and lots of surprises, comical scenes etc. I have often wondered why we had to single out a particular day in the year to say I love you or to give gifts to those we love, because I for one feel love should be expressed every passing day through kind words, gestures, thoughts,gifts when there’s occasion for it or just simply because its the only way you can make that person feel special.

Over time i developed an answer for my question Why should a day be singled out for expressing love? I just figured that apart from the official records on how St Valentine’s day is been celebrated its because a lot of people have forgotten how to show love to their fellow homo sapiens, so its a reminder to us all to say the words I love you, reach out to others with kind words, gifts, a helping hand etc. Do something to show you care.

We did something at my office, we reached out to those in the orphanage, it was little but well received. We need to drop the notion that Valentine is a day for lovers, we should reach out everyone around us, someone needs a kind word, a pat on the back, an inexpensive gift, a helping hand etc. Endeavor to do one of these as often as you can. Don’t wait for Valentine Day.

I was amazed at the shops I visited to pick up something for my Husband and the bulk of shoppers were teenagers picking perfumes,cards,frames,chocolates etc. a lot of them have picked up the notion that you exchange gifts with the opposite sex on Valentine Day. Please help spread the word and teach them to be kind to others everyday. As we all celebrate all the wonderful people around us, I wish you all find love always and forever. HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY CIAO